Secret agent tech writer

I decided to further my career by signing up for a continuing education class in technical writing. DID YOU EVEN KNOW I’M A TECHNICAL WRITER? It’s literally what I do. Literally <- see what I did there? Play on words.

I’ve become aware that not many people know what I do apart from triathlon. Which is kind of the point and I think I like to keep it that way, including my boss, because then he’s just constantly impressed when I finish a project. Like, “woah! I didn’t even know you were working on that!”

During school drop off one morning a teacher said, “I have to tell you the funniest thing! We asked your preschooler what you do for work and she said you sit in front of a computer and talk!” Then she kinda leaned in, like, isn’t that funny but what do you really do….?

I just laughed. And drove away in my mini van like a boss. Like a secret agent boss.

No. I write things, for a software company. I write system descriptions, how-to guides, user manuals, marketing collateral, and an occasional video tutorial. I like taking the chaos and making it understandable in chunks. Plus I get to use some really cool programs.

It’s given me perspective on everyday things. For example, I just bought a new coffee grinder and I lovingly paged through the user manual, then turned my attention to the Troubleshooting Guide, and lastly spent some time perusing the FAQ. The next time you buy a new TV and chuck that quick start guide in the bin, know that someone, somewhere spent a lot of time creating that for you. And that margins are really tricky, no matter what type of document.

I also like it because the product my company creates is used in emergency responses. We design dispatch software. What is that? When you see an ambulance, fire truck, or police car zipping down the road with sirens, they’re using software to communicate with a dispatch center which tells them where to go, how bad the accident is, who else is coming or what the potential risks are. Or, heaven forbid, you call 911. The person on the phone is going to enter your call information into that same system and be able to send the right help to you, really quickly.

So I thought I should brush up on what it means to be a technical writer, keep my mind sharp. I found a Society for Technical Communications with certification levels based upon examinations and continuing education requirements. Never one to turn down a challenge, I enrolled in an 8 week course.

One evening per week, online, with a test at the end and I would be a Level I Tech Writer. This was exciting. This was new. The kids were into it: Mom was in school and it was important and they needed to be quiet and it was right during bedtime but that’s fine even though the camera has to be on and class participation is required.

Three classes into my course and the professor emailed to say the Society of Technical Writers had folded, disbanded, and declared bankruptcy. As such the class was canceled and goodbye.

I was flabbergasted. Not only was the class canceled, but the entire society, which has been around for decades, shut down. Hubs has really enjoyed watching this all unfold.

“Hey, remember that time school dropped out on you?”

“Oh, you’re becoming a member of a town committee? Do you want them to close their doors?”

“You were trying to better yourself? Maybe let’s not do that anymore.”

As an aside, I did join my library committee and knew it was a sound decision when the welcome email informed me they met “the first Monday of every other odd month.” Take a second and let that sink in. It means we meet in January, skip March, meet in May… In reality, we’re only meeting 3 times a year. Why wouldn’t you just say we meet once a trimester?

Turns out, the misinterpretation was mine as the true spirit of the schedule is that we meet every other month, that is odd. And no, I’m not saying that it’s odd we meet every other month. See how confusing this is? But I can’t be too upset because this is literally why people like me have a job.

Anyway. Back to the original topic. I don’t have a class anymore. But I do have class. <- See what I did there?